Nothing about our lives is certain, except for one thing. We will all die one day. Some of us have accepted that fact and live their lives not worrying about it. But others fear death and live with that fear. But why do we fear death?
Most of us go through our daily lives in a healthy state of denial regarding death. We’ll only face death when reminded of it by losing a loved one or someone close to us. But there are many reasons to fear death, especially when everything about it is uncertain. We don’t know how or when it’ll happen or any variable of it. The human brain craves certainty, so anything that doesn’t have a definite answer gives anxiety.
Another reason we might fear death comes from our survival instincts. Our bodies and minds are constantly focused on not dying at all times. This is the reason why you gain energy when in a high-risk or threatening situation. This causes our body to immediately respond, without our conscious intention, which makes it possible to escape. The prevention of our own life ending dictates all that we do.
As humans, we fear grief; we fear losing someone close to us. But what a lot of people don’t notice is that our own death involves grief too. It also means giving up our whole lives as we know it. This results in leaving a lot of our loved ones behind, most of the time without a goodbye. A lot of our fears of death are based on what we imagine death to be like, rather than real evidence. Medical death means the ending of our bodily and brain functions. We don’t know for certain that it means ceasing to exist entirely. There have been many records of people who have been through near-death experiences that have memories of things that occurred while they appeared to be “Medically dead.” Sometimes it’s even things that happened in an entirely other area.
The way someone thinks about death can affect how we think and act. A 2016 study discovered that fearing death could fuel a desire for revenge and violence. Those who are reminded of death regularly are more likely to support military action than those who’ve only thought of pain. Fearing death also makes it hard to grieve. Recent studies have shown that fearing death makes you more likely to have extended periods of grief after losing someone close to you, compared to individuals who’ve accepted death.
There are multiple reasons why we might fear death or sources that might cause a fear of death. For example, a common misconception is that older people fear death more. This might be because its approaching for them, so they should fear death more. But this is far from the truth. Older people tend to fear death less. This has been shown in a pattern of studies. Older age is often associated with the acceptance of death as well. This might be because they have more life experience so they have less of a fear of missing out. Since older people have more life experience, they also have more experience with grief and death. This makes death not as scary for them.
It’s also widely known that religion can increase someone’s fear of death. Many may think religion includes confidence in a secure afterlife, or a greater meaning to death as a whole, would make people feel better about the idea of death. But studies have shown that with someone who is heavily tied to religion, regardless of their culture/ religion, they have a stronger fear of death. While this is all true its worth noting that some studies have said the opposite. Some have said that among Westerners, people who fear death are moderately religious. Both non-believers and very religious people can fear death less.
Your physical health can also heavily affect how you might feel about death. People with better physical health tend to fear death less. The reasoning behind that comes from the fact that those with better physical health visually feel more meaning towards life. People with good physical health also tend to have positive mental health. These characteristics make them overall fear death less. This can also encourage people who can’t even control their physical health; this may help them find meaning.
Someone’s attachment style can also affect how they view death. An attachment style refers to how we think about and behave in relationships. These are shaped early on in life, and when you’re an adult, this is normally fully settled in. Secure attachment style people are confiding, dependable, and overall supportive partners. Insecure attachment people can be overly anxious and controlling, distant, and stand-offish. How they feel about death: Secure attachment people fear death less than insecure attachment people. This shows there’s a relationship and an intimacy aspect to how we think about death.
While death is inevitable, we should all try to live our lives not fearing it. Everything about how we live can be beautiful, so we shouldn’t spend our only life fearing the end.
