Toxic Relationships


Image via Domestic Shelters

Aerianna Hubel

Toxic relationships are unwanted. You never choose to have one. Toxic relationships can be changed though, right? Yes, but only if both people in the relationship are willing to change for the better. It takes two for a healthy relationship to work. You can have a toxic relationship with anyone. You can have one with your parents, siblings, romantic partners, etc. They are definitely not an easy subject to talk about, listen to, or have. If you and the other person are willing to change and make the relationship better, you will see progress in the relationship, but only if both people put in the effort to change. 


You can see the signs of a toxic relationship, or you can choose to ignore them. There are multiple signs of a toxic relationship. You can’t always see them right away in the relationship, but if you end up staying together, you may notice red flags. Over time, you will find certain things in the relationship that you or your partner don’t like about each other. You will see what your partner is truly like and how they act on a day-to-day basis. The more you spend time with them and the more you talk with them, the more comfortable you will feel. It depends on how comfortable you are with them. They may not like when you do certain things, and it may upset and annoy them. Your partner telling you that they don’t like something you are doing isn’t necessarily yelling at you or being toxic. They are just communicating how they are feeling with you and you have to accept that. 


There are many signs of a toxic relationship if you can spot them. First of all, toxic communication. This may come in the form of yelling, ignoring one another, speaking over each other, or cursing at each other. Secondly, controlling behavior. Saying what you can do, post, or who you can talk to and hang out with.  Another red flag is dishonesty. Being able to trust your partner and having your partner be able to trust you should be a great and rewarding feeling. Why lie, cheat, or steal from your significant other when you can just be happy with them? You don’t need to lie or manipulate. Yes, they may get mad at you, but it’s better than telling them a lie and leaving them to figure out it themselves. Lying to your partner will only make them distrust you, and won’t fix anything. Lastly, actions and disrespect. If your partner is treating you anything less than you really are then you need to leave. If your partner is manipulating you or being a narcissist, you need to leave them. If they do not respect your boundaries, then you need to leave or communicate. Last but not least, if your partner leaves and comes back over and over again. If your partner does this, it is not a healthy relationship. It drains you, and love isn’t supposed to drain you.


Toxic relationships are hard, but you can get through them if you can see the signs of them. Leave that relationship because it isn’t good for you. Learn from the mistakes in the relationship and move on with your life. Make sure that you are taken care of, and don’t let anyone treat you like that ever again.