They say “home is where the heart is.” It’s where “you lay your head to rest.” “Home isn’t a place, it’s a feeling.”

Every day, after school or work, we return to our humble abodes, our homes. Every home is different, but it brings the same warm and safe feeling. Homes aren’t just financial assets or storage units, they are more than buildings. Not all homes are even the same house or apartment, they can change, develop, and grow. It might not even be where you live, it might be something less straightforward and more metaphorical.

Some people live in the same house for the first 18 years of their life and then move on. Others change houses again and again. Some go between two houses each week. However, which one is home? It’s not easy to say that in both places one feels safe, comfortable, and happy because life constantly is changing and leaving new experiences upon people as they grow and develop. Who’s to say that home for an individual means feeling safe, comfortable, and happy? Home could have a totally different meaning for you, then it does for me. 

There are those who are without a home of their own. They return to a house, a roof over their head, nothing more. The seven hours away from their house are more homely to them than their place of living. 

There are those without a house who wander the streets at night staring at the stars, hoping and wishing for the world to change. Wishing for a home. 

There are those who return to their house, thankful for an escape from reality, to have a safe haven. 

What makes a home a home though? I’ve talked with family, friends, and teachers, to try to really nail what home is. Here’s what I’ve discovered; home is subjective to the person and the circumstance. 

For teenagers, I expected it to be simple, but I was surprised that most answers had nothing to do with their home being where they lived. Instead, I found that home was no one thing, that it had so many meanings, and that for some they were still learning what it was. I talked to one of my friends about it, and they told me that home was where you feel loved. That you know you are where you are meant to be when you are with those who love you. Home is where you feel safe. I talked to one of my other friends, and he said that home was a couple of things for him. For starters, home is wherever those who matter to him are. It’s not just that though, it’s where you feel comfortable and safe to be you, and do what you want or need to do. Adding to this, home is where laughter grows and love thrives. From someone I know, who recently moved and has moved around a lot all of his life, he said that homes where you are happy, it doesn’t matter where. I talked to multiple people about this, and I also heard a lot of kids say they don’t know what home means, that they haven’t found out yet. 

For the older generations, I got similar answers, but they seemed more specific to their lives. Home could be anywhere, but my brother said it has to be with his wife and his kids. One response that I received that sums up all the other responses came from one of my sisters; “After a long hard day, or super emotional or stressful day, I just want to come home and let everything roll off my shoulders. When I walk through my door I instantly feel security and comfort. No need to please the world. It’s my space to be myself, laugh, love, get loud, be goofy, cry, use my voice when I get mad, forgive, and relax.” For a lot of adults, that’s what home is, it’s this place where the world is not allowed to judge and you are safe. Home sometimes is more specific, maybe it’s where your love or your kids are. Sometimes, this one city or state is more of a home than just a house. 

Home may be something you search for your whole life, or maybe you know where home is when you breathe for the first time. It could be a smell, a feeling, a place, a memory, and it could be something only you understand.

 One thing home is without a doubt is something everyone deserves to have and experience. A home can be where you are no longer required to be strong, and your guard can fall, and in times of an epidemic or emotional distress, it can be the only thing that helps to relieve the pain.