A Letter to My Aspirations

Letters to… series

To My Aspirations,


I know, it has been a long time. I’ve given up on many of you, some were just phases. I used to dream of playing in a band, or singing for crowds and traveling the world. Then I came to realize that my crippling anxiety and fear of public speaking wasn’t going to let that happen. I gave up on daydreaming about being the one to stand up on a stage and have millions of people know who I am.

Then it was being a photographer and traveling the world, taking photos wherever I went. It’s an on-off relationship with this dream of mine. I’d always hoped to buy a nice camera to take photos of anything and everything with. Finally, I got my hands on one and my drive to pursue that aspiration fell; we lost touch. Occasionally, I’ll pick it up again when the sunset is more colorful than usual or the moon is peeking out to say hello, just to put it back down for a while and let dust collect on top of it.

Between then and where I am now, there has been a lot of change in what I aspire to be. A musician, a youtube creator, an interior designer, a photographer… I’ve fallen in and out of love with it all. But this one, this one hobby of mine has really stuck with me and has been there when I haven’t even realized it. I should have realized sooner when in fourth grade I was awarded “young author” in front of my entire class for writing a story about my goldfish that my teacher was amazed by. In middle school, I was constantly thinking of new story ideas, abandoning whatever it was I already had in the works and beginning a new one. That leaves me where I am now, dreaming of being an author someday and finally managing to finish a book. I haven’t given up on you just yet. I still daydream of when I push myself back out of my desk chair and sigh “the end”, and finally be able to say that I caught you before I let you fly away.