Body Image

TW: Mentions of Mental Health Disorders

   Body image plays such a huge part in your life as you grow up and see the real world. There are the people who you think are “perfect”, the people who put you down, and yourself. Having a poor body image or people constantly talking about your body really makes you second guess how you look, this leads to insecurities, bad mental health, or even an eating disorder. Eating disorders come in multiple different forms and look different on everyone else. It’s also a disorder that not only affects you physically, but mentally too. 

    Types of eating disorders consist of anorexia, bulimia, binging, purging, body dysmorphia, and more. The thing is most people think eating disorders are just focused on losing weight, but it can be the opposite sometimes, instead of purging and not eating you could be binging and gaining weight. You also don’t have to be super skinny or big to suffer from an eating disorder, they can affect anyone, because maybe you hated the way your body looks and wanted to lose weight or gain it. It is such a toxic hurtful disorder to have, because it consists of starving yourself and not eating enough, or you just are so harsh on yourself because you aren’t happy with what you’re seeing in the mirror. Sometimes an eating disorder feels like one endless loop, you lose weight, get unhealthy, try and gain weight, hate what you see in the mirror, then start all over again. It’s such an under-the-radar disorder, because no one knows that you could be starving yourself since it’s such an easy thing to hide from the people around you.

     One of the types of eating disorders that is more common than others is Bulimia, the acts of obsessing about losing weight and purging. This then leads to extreme overeating and binging on foods. It’s also painful, the stomach pains are so harsh and your body won’t go back to “normal.” You can permanently mess up so much of your body by putting yourself through so much. Believe it or not, eating disorders aren’t always intentional; missing days of eating then it turns into a habit and you become obsessed with the results you’ve been wanting, but also hurting yourself so much through the process. Speaking from experience and still not being fully recovered, hearing “They’re gonna put you in treatment if you don’t get better,” from my mom hurt a lot. It gave me a reality check. Although, I still don’t enjoy eating or ever want to, I still try, even if I find myself falling into the loop of toxicity, and stop eating for a while. 

     The feeling of not loving yourself and not feeling confident in the body you were born with is so sad and devastating, because you feel like you need to completely starve yourself to the point where your own body can’t take it anymore. It’s physically and mentally exhausting, the body checking, restrictive eating, insecurities, the pain it’s all so draining to the human body. Sometimes I wish people wouldn’t have to feel like hurting themselves in that way to fit society’s “standards” to be socially acceptable. People can see the real natural beauty of the human body and how everyone is different, looks different, acts different, and that’s the beauty about the human body, everyone is different there is not one person that can be you. Speaking from the heart and straight from experience, eating food even if it’s small light snacking or a big meal that makes you happy, eat it, eat it all I promise there’s gonna be too many regrets that’ll form if you don’t go to that dinner with your family, or don’t eat those snacks with your friends. It can make you feel so happy having a full stomach knowing you are fueling your body, you need that food to live, to enjoy life. It will not be the end of the world, one quote I heard that really helps me keep eating when I find it extremely hard is “One meal won’t make you gain weight” and the person that told me this is right, one meal, dessert, or snack isn’t going to change your appearance forever. You need food to survive and in the moment it doesn’t seem like it, but over time when you start hurting and your mental health is at its lowest, you’re going to realize you need it to survive, to fuel your body, and to make you happy.