The Fortnite Epidemic

  Schools all over the nation have been reporting the so-called “Fortnite Epidemic”. Kids all over the world are developing what seems to be a highly contagious disease where it seems they have no control of their bodies as they dance meaninglessly. They say that the victim’s brain tells them they look good when they dance, but that is completely false. The people affected by the disease produce such bad dance quality, that schools have put in rules against the dancing in an attempt to contain this disease. Experts say that if you see someone dancing horribly anywhere, you must avert your eyes, shield your face, and run in the opposite direction. This is the most effective way of keeping the disease from spreading. Quarantine zones are being constructed to contain these infected individuals safely. But until we are sure we have secured an infected person, no one is safe.

An interview with the creators of Fortnite at Epic Games took place last night. Confronted with the problem they have created, their only reply was “Sorry”. Reports say that right after the interview team left, the company started adding new dances to the game. The creators were asked by many reporters and received mail asking why they “cursed our nation” with the game. The global number of people affected has been skyrocketing since January 2017. Research shows that if the disease continues to spread, we will all be corrupted and have urges to do these ridiculous dances. We need to work together to put an end to the madness that is Fortnite.